Yes, I think we all know Twitter isn’t real life. Twitter is more like a hyped-up, super-charged, jokey, earnest, racist, misogynist, hate-filled and grumpy version of real life with some fun pet GIFS and the occasional Woj bomb. You don’t want to draw too many conclusions.
But … the other day I Tweeted this:
Just a fun little fact about one of the greatest players in the history of baseball.
And some of the responses were … well, they were pure Twitter.
Sigh.
Here’s the thing that strikes me about this: There’s no way Pujols is just suddenly taking steroids. I mean, no, we can never know for sure, can never prove a negative, but it is ridiculous on its face. Why in the world would Pujols go ELEVEN YEARS without taking steroids while watching his career crash and then, in what he has announced as his final year, as a part-time player, suddenly just go: “OK, time to take some steroids as I walk out the door!”
That doesn’t make any sense at all. None.
Plus … that’s not how steroids work. You don’t just take them the way Popeye took spinach and suddenly you’re a great baseball player. PEDs are not magic beans. They cannot turn you or I into even a half-decent baseball player. They do not, as I understand it, produce instant results. Yes, they make you stronger. Yes, they give you the energy to work out longer and with more intensity. Yes, they can help you come back from injury faster.
But a fresh cycle of PEDs isn’t just suddenly, overnight turning Albert Pujols into a … well, what even is Albert Pujols? He’s a 42-year-old guy having a fantastic stretch against left-handed pitchers. That’s all. He’s still hitting .195/.285/.361 against righties.
He must be using those lefty pitching steroids.